A Safe Haven
by Candace Marie
Summary: This is based on the premise that like Annie, Heaven survived the fatal car accident that killed her husband. To protect her daughter, she falls prey to Tony Tatterton once again. When the world believes she has died, can she reemerge victorious or will the secrets and shadows of her past drown her happiness? Will she finally admit the secrets she has kept from those she loves most
1. Alive

A Safe Haven

Chapter One: Alive

I heard voices and a monitor. "She's waking up, Mr. Tatterton," I heard someone say. I tried to open my eyes, but they felt so heavy. Finally, I looked around to see Tony and a nurse hovering over me. Where was I? What was I doing here? Where were Logan and Annie?

Some of those questions I could answer myself. I was in a hospital, but where? Knowing Tony he had moved me back to Boston. Where were Logan and Annie? I tried to speak but no words came out.

"Relax, Heaven," Tony was saying, "You've been through a traumatic experience." I frowned, unable to say anything. Knowing him had been a traumatic experience. I just wanted to see my daughter. My Annie, my sweet Annie, was she alright?

"Where's Annie?" I asked.

"Annie," Tony smiled, "Why she's with me Heaven, with her family." I frowned. That wasn't what had been left in my will. If anything happened to Logan or I then Drake was supposed to take care of Annie, then Fanny, I wouldn't have left Tony in charge not after what had happened before.

"No…" I whispered, my voice still coming out short.

"You've been in a coma for a month. This time I'm going to make everything right, Heaven, and be the father you deserve, the father you need. I'm going to make it up to you.

"Where's my husband?" I asked.

"Heaven," he said taking my hands in one of his, "I'm sorry to tell you, but Logan is already dead and buried. He died in that car crash." No! I thought, not Logan, not my husband. At least Annie was safe. I thought of Troy, and wondered where he was, and if I dared to set foot on the grounds of Farthy once more. No matter what kind of love I held for Troy I wouldn't for the world put myself and my daughter under Tony's thumb. I drifted in and out of sleep, memories of Troy coming back to me. I thought of Annie, our Annie. That was a secret not even Tony knew.

When I next awoke, a doctor was explaining my condition and that it would be a while before I would be able to walk, that I would have to rely on a wheelchair. "Don't count on it," I told him. "I may be in this chair, but I won't stay," the doctor agreed with me, but explained the process. Of course, Tony was right there listening and plotting.

"Doctor, I would prefer having this conversation in private," I said before the conversation went on too long, "Mr. Tatterton can wait outside." The doctor looked from me to him and finally he relented and left, waiting for me. "I don't want Mr. Tatterton to be informed of my health. You should inform me directly."

"But Mrs. Stonewall, he is your father."

"I am legally an adult and I will pay for my own treatment, all concerns should be addressed to me directly," I said, and though I wasn't as formidable as I would have been standing on my own two feet, the doctor seemed to agree with me. Tony entered and had picked me up some clothes. "Where are my things Tony?" I couldn't help but ask.

"We can send someone around to get your things but I brought this especially for you, and there are still things at home of yours."

"My home is not Farthy," I told him, but it was like he didn't hear me. I was carried behind him to the limo, and despite myself I smiled at the familiar face. "Hello, Miles."

"Hello, Miss Heaven."

"It's good to see you again," I said, genuinely meaning it. The servants of Farthy were dear to my heart, especially Rye Whiskey. As soon as I got an opportunity I was going to see if Troy was in the cottage, and find a way to my daughter. There was no force that would keep me here, like my mother, I would find a way to leave Farthy forever. Every time I thought I was free, something happened to ensnare me in Farthy and Tony's world once again. This time it was my daughter, I could not leave my daughter under Tony's lecherous eyes.


	2. Return to Farthy

Chapter Two

Returning to Farthy

Truthfully, Tony scared me sometimes. I was seated in the back with Tony, with my father. I hadn't had to really acknowledge Tony as my father, but being in close proximity to him, I saw the resemblances I hadn't seen or refused to acknowledge before. "Where is my daughter? How is she?" I asked him as soon as I was able.

"Where?" he asked looking around as if the answer was written down, "Why at Farthy, of course. She sustained injuries in the car crash, like you did. Like you she is unable to walk."

My poor Annie, my daughter. She needed me, now more than ever. I had to tell her things, things I had never wanted to talk to her about, to discuss with her. Painful things that I would rather not dwell on. Such as my parentage, and her own. Suddenly, Tony got excited.

"Turn your head to the right," he was saying, "The first glimpse of Farthinggale Manor is a sight to behold. Look for the break in the treeline."

"I've seen Farthy before," I reminded him, but unable to stop myself I looked.

"Farthy was built by my great-great-great grandfather in 1850, but don't let its age fool you, Annie."

"Annie?" I asked. He knew who I was. "Where is Annie?" I asked again, even as Farthy loomed before me. I felt not the relief I felt when returning to Winnerrow, but chains as if this place had once again brought me back. No matter how many times I left, I could never really escape Farthy or the Tattertons. This place had seemed like a virtual prison, my only escape being Troy's cottage, and now without my ability to walk, just how much of a prison is it?

Tony blinked, "Why she's at Farthy, of course, Heaven."

"I want to see her."

"You will, Heaven," he said running his hands through my hair. I jerked away, I didn't want to be anywhere near this man. If it wasn't for protecting Annie from him, I wouldn't have come. And if I were to admit it to myself, I wanted to see Troy again. I would grieve for Logan, but if I wasn't completely honest with myself though I loved him, God knows I did, a part of me resented him for being who he was, and for not being who I wanted him to be, for not being Troy. I saw a freshly dug grave.

"Your parents grave," he whispered to me. My parents? What was he talking about? My parents were Luke and Leigh Casteel, and I knew where my mother was buried. I also knew where Luke and Stacie were buried, having attended their funeral myself. He was my father and he was still alive. Or was he confusing me not with Jillian or with Leigh but with my own daughter. Did she think I was dead. I didn't comment, as I was carried inside by the staff.

"Tony, why don't you get me a wheelchair, I can wheel myself into the house. I will not be carried around like an invalid," I protested, but my pleas fell on deaf ears. Was this just the beginning of losing my independence? Even in the Willies half-starved and beaten I hadn't felt so helpless!

I was carried up to my old suite of rooms. Tony opened the door. "The suite of Mr. and Mrs. Logan Stonewall," he announced as if Logan were standing beside me before he put me on the bed. I looked around the room. There was a wheelchair there. At least there was that. "I know, darling, that this isn't ideal," he said but I am so grateful to have you back." I was silent, saying nothing. All I wanted was to find my daughter and to discover for myself what had happened to Logan. I didn't trust him, and I hadn't in a long time.

After he was left, I looked over at where the phone had been, and picked it up. I would call Hasbrook House and put an end to all this. I would call Troy in his cottage, I just hoped he was there. When I pulled myself over to the phone, there was no dial tone. It figured. Tony meant to keep me prisoner. I looked over the bed, and saw the replica to the painting I had in my suite of rooms at home. No expense had been spared to recreate our rooms. I had left this place with Drake intent on never seeing this place of my father ever again. I looked over on the dresser and saw a hairbrush. My hairbrush, with hair still in it. What had Tony done to this room? It looked so new, and it shouldn't it had been ages since I had stepped foot in this room. Just how far gone had Jillian's death made him? What kind of dangers were Annie and I in now?


	3. Servants

Meeting the Servants

I lost all sense of time, weary and weak from the drugs and from the recent coma that I had been in. The doctors came in and out, prodding and observing me. There was a private nurse hired just for me and I resented her but the feeling was mutual.

"I'll tell you what your problem is you are spoilt," she told me one day.

"Excuse me?" I asked, barely able to understand what she was saying.

"I've seen spoiled women like you before, and you become useless dolls, you never get better."

That really riled me up. "Are you kidding me? Tell me Mrs. Saunders was it?" I asked, turning my cornflower blue eyes on her, "I have walked five miles to school in the snow uphill." She smirked at me.

"Sure you have. I can't see that father of yours allowing something like that. You were waited on hand and foot."

Heaven glared at her. "You are fired," she told her.

"You don't have the authority to fire me. And if you keep firing your nurses you will never get better," she clucked her tongue.

"Get me some clothes," I grit out. I wasn't staying a prisoner of this room, a moment more.

She smirked but did as I asked. After bringing myself into a sitting position, I unbuttoned the top, pushing my arms out of the sleeves. I wore no bra, and frowned. I liked my privacy. I lay back down trying to wiggle out of the pants but having trouble.

"Need help?" she asked. I didn't respond, and finally she lifted me up and pulled the material back roughly. The woman was overweight which didn't bode well considering her profession. She had her hair pulled back to her head tightly, and as I watched several of the hairs spung free. I could only imagine what Jillian would have said about this lady. I stifled a giggle as I thought of Jillian encountering this lady. I believe in her own way, Jillian cared for me. I resented her for tearing Troy and I apart, but in her own way I had to believe that she cared. There were some moments especially toward the end where she was very kind, where we had bonded in a way, even though I had run from her like my mother had, I couldn't stay away for myself and my mother I had owed it to her to take care of her.

The nurse left and a maid entered. "Hello Mrs. Stonewall?" she greeted me.

"Hello," I replied with a small smile. "What's your name?"

"Lily mam."

"Lily, do you know where Rye Whiskey is?"

"Mr. Tatterton doesn't want us to call him that," she replied.

"I imagine," I responded dryly. "Can you send him up to see me," I asked.

"Yes, mam," she said before leaving. Heaven looked down at the dress she was wearing. It was a light blue one that seemed to match the color of her eyes. I was able to get into a wheelchair. Such simple things I had taken for granted. I should have never let Logan drive me and Annie, then this wouldn't be happening. He would be alive, and Annie and I would be together. He had been drinking, I had counted four drinks and despite the food he had eaten, it wasn't enough. He had taken the curves too fast and the rain was too hard. Still, I had to find out if he had died or not, and do what I could to get Tony back out of our lives.

Rye Whiskey appeared. "Miss Heaven, is that really you? Or are you a spirit too?"

"No, Rye, it's me," I said with a gentle smile.

"I thought you had died, like Mr. Troy. I wouldn't say anything but since you already know about him…" he trailed off.

"I'm alive Rye," I said to him, knowing I couldn't get him to get me to Troy. Troy would help get me to Annie. "Where's Annie? Where's my daughter?"

"She's gone."

"Gone?"

"She left before Mr. Tatterton went to get you. I told her that she best be leaving, and she did. I don't blame her none."

"Annie?"

"You look so much like your ma and grandma, if you don't mind me saying so."

"No Rye, I don't mind. I've got to get to her."

"Yes mam, I know."

"You've been drinking?" I asked.

"I just drink to prevent snakebite. And you know what miss?"

"I haven't been bitten," Heaven laughed a long with him.

"I'll go see about your food then Mrs. Heaven," he said before leaving. I wasn't staying long. I had to get to Annie. I had to get to my daughter, Tony, had obviously either lost it or he had lied. Either one was a possibility, but after seeing him in Jillian's things he had lost it. I shivered as I remembered his attack, and I felt sympathy for my mother once again. How scared she most have been in this house!


	4. Drake

Drake Casteel

I was stuck at Farthy. Even though, I knew that Annie, my Annie was safe and at home, I couldn't leave in the state I was in. The hateful nurse remained. Tony barely stopped in, but sometimes he would speak to me from the doorway. Today, however he opened the door.

"Heaven, I have a surprise for you," he said clapping his hands and rubbing them together. Tony's eyes sparkled with either madness or excitement, I wasn't sure which.

"I want to go home, Tony. You can't keep me here like a prisoner," I said icily.

"Be nice, Heaven. I am your father," he said with great authority. I glared back at him, how dare he claim that at this point in my life. Not for the first time, I wished I could have just one conversation with my mother, and find out the truth, I didn't trust or believe anything he had said. I didn't say anything as he looked around the room. "Drake is coming to visit you." I frowned, why was Drake speaking to Tony? Why was Tony involved in Drake's life? "In fact, he should be here in a few hours," he said with a smile. "Do you want me to help you dress?" he asked.

I looked at him, infuriated. "I can dress myself, Thank you," I told him, though I longed to ask about Troy. Was he still traveling from place to place? Had he returned to the cottage? How could I get there? Tony left and I found myself, struggling to get into the bathtub. There was no way, Drake would see me looking less than he had ever seen me looking. Fortunately, Tony had taken great pains to make over my room, so that with enough energy, I could easily navigate the bath. I sat in a wheelchair and then pulled myself into the new chair that was sitting there. Things had been changed so that I would be able to bathe myself. And bathe I did. Then with a towel around my hair, I returned to my wheelchair, to my mirror.

And I looked at myself. I had gotten so pale, so very, very, very pale. Jillian would have screamed if she had seen herself looking this way. There were lines of worry around my eyes that hadn't been there before. I reached for perfume on the dresser and frowned once I lifted it to my nose. It was jasmine. Jillian's perfume. There was one many that I didn't want to see me as my mother or grandmother, so I hastily put the perfume back down. I wheeled my wheelchair to the closet and turn the crank that brought my wardrobe on eye level. These dresses and gowns had been so old. When was the last time I had worn any of these things? Still I chose a red and black dress that fell to my ankles. Then, I returned to dry my hair and brush it until it shown. Like Jillian used to do, I say before my vanity and put on make-up so that my skin retained the ageless beauty it had always had. I really had to get out of here. Jillian had used Farthy as a form of escape from reality never realizing that it had trapped her. Well, I wouldn't let it trap me.

Not hours later, Tony brought Drake in, though he wasn't the Drake I had raised. He was different, more like Tony than I could stand. Still, tears filled his eyes as he hugged me. "Heaven, Heaven you are alive!" he cried out as he put his arms around me.

"Drake!" I cradled him, cupped his face like I had when he was a small child, when he was so lost and alone and helpless. How our roles had reversed. Tears fill my eyes, I should have been there for him, for Annie, and I wasn't.

"I'm so glad you are alive," he was saying to me.

"Get me out of here," I told him, in a stern voice. He blanched, the way Tony would. I looked from him to Tony. "I want to leave," I said, looking between them.

"Heaven, you aren't well yet," Drake said, "The moment you are I will whisk you out of here myself." Why did he look to Tony for approval? He owed his loyalty to me, not Tony, what was going on.

"I want to leave now. At least take me outside. I need some fresh air," I told him. He looked at Tony who stepped forward.

"I think that's a wonderful idea," Tony said with a smile. Why had Drake needed Tony's permission? I looked from Drake to Tony. Drake was wearing a suit, in the same style as Tony's. For a split second I had thought that he looked more like Tony and less like Luke. Drake who had always showered me with the love that Luke had denied me. Drake had been so smart, so personable, and he had had a heart of gold. What had happened to the boy I had raised? When I was outside, I saw the commentary in the background. Drake saw it to and looked nervously at Tony. When had he started going to Tony for advice instead of me? I looked passed the maze and toward the cottage. Was Troy there?

"I saw Annie earlier this week," Drake said softly, so soft I had to keen my ears to hear. "She's at the Hasbrook House, with Fanny and Junior," he said, in a foreboding tone. I wanted to be there. I wanted my daughter, there was a reason I had left all this behind, and to be stuck here a prisoner, it was more than I could bear

"That's a fine English maze, is it not Drake?" Tony was saying. He then described how his great something granddad had built it or had found someone to build it. I didn't care about that, I started to wheel myself toward it, hoping to find Troy there. As I headed inside the maze, I felt myself being pulled around forcefully.

"Did your mother tell you my brother committed suicide," Tony said, his face red, and his eyes bulging.

"Tony, I know Troy's alive. Let me go to him," I felt the panic in my voice.

"Troy's dead," Tony said in a deadpan voice. No, he couldn't be, could he? Tony had confused the past and present before. Was he doing it again? I had never spoken about Troy before. Did he think I was Annie or Leigh? If it was Annie, did that mean that Troy was alive. But what if he was dead? I looked back at Drake and knew that he wouldn't help me not now. But I wasn't giving up on Drake, not yet. I had promised to take care of him and protect him, even from Tony, and myself if that was what it took.

"Tony, I know he's alive, We've had this talk before," I tried to remind him. "How could you lie to me about there being a body?" I asked him. He didn't respond. It was as if he was in a daze again. What was I going to do, I had to get out of here, no matter what! I had to find out if Logan was dead, and I had to find Troy and protect Annie. After a few moments, Drake returned.

"I tried calling Annie but she won't take any of my calls," Drake was saying to me. "I caught Junior seducing her. I know he's being lusting after her for years, I took it upon myself to set him straight, now Annie won't talk to me. I was just trying to protect her, everyone knows they are brother and sister," he said. I frowned, except they weren't. Not really. Perhaps, it had been my own selfishness in trying to keep them apart. I had known that my daughter was too close to Fanny's son, and although there was no reason for it, I had warned her away from him, insisting she go out with the town boys. Perhaps, in some ways I was no better than my father or Jillian.


	5. Attempted Escape

Chapter Four:

Attempted Escape

I awoke in a different nightgown. I frowned, had Tony changed me? No, I shook my head, he wouldn't do that, not after the way I left things when I had fled Farthinggale Manor, much in the same way my mother had. Perhaps, I should have tried harder to discover why my mother had ran away from this mansion? But I hadn't. I had let the magic of my life and my romance with Tony's brother deter me from the truth, but never again. Never again would I forget what I should have learned from my mother. Never again would Tony Tatterton control my life.

I felt my will strengthening, my spine stiffening. I looked around for the wheelchair. It was gone. Tony had taken it, but no matter, I would get out of here, he would not keep me prisoner. Annie needed me, and I needed her. I had to get out of here, I owed Annie the truth, the truth that had been kept from me, and the truth that I had kept from her. I had added to the lies and deception and perhaps like my grandmother, I had added to the deceptions.

I pulled the covers back and used my hands to pull my legs close to the bed. Intentionally, I fell off the bed, and landed with a loud thud. I hoped I hadn't broken or dislocated anything. I laid there, and tried to move my toes. Then, I felt it, a tingling in my toes, but it wasn't enough. There was no way I was walking today.

Still, I wouldn't give up, not yet. Now that I was out of the bed, what now? I pulled my body over and using my hands I began to crawl toward the door that was luckily open. Once I got to the door, I took a deep breath and relaxed. I must have dozed off because it seemed darker when I awoke. I could almost see the top of the stairs, as I pulled my legs behind me heaving and grunting. I found a chair near the stairs and was able to pull myself into it. I was shaking all over from the effort. I looked around trying to figure out how to operate the thing. If I could just find a telephone, I could get out of here.

Pushing a button, the chair moved, and at the bottom of the contraption and found a wheelchair. I smiled as I panted, out of breathe. I took a moment to catch her breath and gather my strength. Tony didn't have any electric wheelchair here but a manual one. I knew that my grandmother wouldn't have stood with that. Finally, I found a telephone and dialed a familiar number.

"Hello," I heard the southern twang of my sister.

"Fanny, don't hang up," I said hurriedly.

"I don't know who ya think ya are, but this is not funny," I heard Fanny's voice.

"Fanny, it's me Heaven," I tried to explain.

"Ma sista's dead, and this ain't funny. Ya want ma sista's money is that it?"

"Fanny! Please, you have to…." The line went dead. I was left alone, and before I could dial another number, I saw Tony rushing in, his face red.

"We've been so worried about you, Heaven," he said and I glared at him. "We have to get you back to bed."

"Tony, I may be paralyzed but I am not an invalid. I am tired of being cooped up in this…prison," I said searching for the right word.

"I was hoping in time, you would come to see this as your home."

"This will never be my home," I said as stubborn as Fanny could be.

"But I was going to talk Troy into coming back to the main house," he said cajoling me. I glared at him, how dare he try and use my love for Troy against me, making me choose between my love and my daughter.

"I don't care, Tony. I want to see Annie," I told him.

"Heaven, he needs you, he really needs you. Can you really turn your back on him? Do you remember what happened the last time you left?"

I hated Tony, truly hated him then. How dare he use Troy's attempted suicide against me? I had been gone for years, years that Troy had lived, and now….no, I had to go. Part of me, a large part of me wanted to see Troy. "No, I want to go home, Tony."

"But Heaven," he said, and then all went black.


	6. The Toymaker

The Toymaker

The past month had been some of the worst times of my life. There had been others, when Leigh had gone away and never came back. When I had discovered that the woman I had wanted to marry was Tony's daughter and my own niece. When I had discovered that she planned on marrying Logan Stonewall after she thought me dead. Following Heaven around on her honeymoon. The many trips to Winnerrow I took so that I could see Heaven and our daughter. The worst was knowing that Heaven was dead, and speaking to our daughter and not claiming her. She was as bright as I had always imagined she would be, and perfect so very perfect.

I remembered clearly that day I had received news that my daughter was born. I had even gone to the hospital and seen her, careful to stay away from Logan's family as well as Heaven's, and most importantly Heaven herself. I was afraid that she would do what she had threatened, give up her marriage for me. I loved her for it, but I didn't want any shame to come to her, not because of me, and never should any shame fall on our daughter. I confess, I wasn't ashamed of being with Heaven, but I didn't want either to feel shame, not because of me. Never because of me, I would sooner cut off my own arm than to cause her an ounce of pain, and she would suffer if the truth ever came out. And so would their daughter, with Logan as her father she could grow and feel pride and security which was what I wanted for them both.

Still, I hadn't been able to not claim my daughter. I had worked painstakingly in duplicating their times at my cottage, their love nest, it had become. I wanted her to know that I

was out there, and that I knew Annie was mine. I remembered having it delivered. I had found someone on the street and asked them to carry it to the Stonewalls, my work was too delicate to be destroyed. And now, I had been told that Heaven was dead. I had gone to her gravesite and talked to her. Never had I imagined that she would die before me. Heaven had had so much life, so much passion, it had seemed impossible that she would die before I did. Yet, she had, or so Tony had told me. But now….I wasn't so sure. I had heard a wheelchair near the maze, and had gone out to see, thinking Annie had comeback, that she had had a setback. I had spotted her. I knew it wasn't Annie, it was her, my forbidden love. My Heavenly Heaven. I heard voices with his, and disappeared behind another hedge.

That had been a few times in my life of pure happiness, most of them having been with my true love, Heaven Leigh. I decided that night to make one of my nocturnal rounds in Farthy and stole quietly up the stairs, memories passing through my mind. I sat by the piano, a piano that I had been told I was very talented at and unable to resist, I stroked the keys, losing myself in my memories and my music. I looked toward the stairs, hoping to see Heaven, but alas unlike the time I had used my music to apologize it was just as empty as it had been since she had run away so many years ago.

I wasn't exactly sure what had made her run away, and had only gotten bits and pieces from Tony, but I was sure she did what was best for her….and for Annie, though I would have liked to have spied on her from time to time on the grounds of Farthy, to have heard more reports from Tony than the information both of us had gathered from investigators. I would have loved to have seen Tony's opinions on my daughter. My daughter, that was one secret I had kept even from him.

I walked quietly up the steps but even so, I spotted some of the servants though they didn't look surprised to see me. I imagined Rye Whiskey entertained them often enough with tales of my death and spirit that was trapped. Truthfully, there were many moments in which I felt like one of Rye Whiskey's spirits. I remembered where Heaven's newer suite was, and made myself there. It had been our parents suite, Heaven's grandparents though she had never met them.

I opened the door quietly, and approached her bedroom, sticking to the shadows, if she was here, I had to know for myself. Approaching the bed, I peered down to see the blankets a mile high, but they obviously contained a young woman. Closer I crept, seeing Heaven asleep, holding the pillow to herself, I wondered what she was thinking, what she was dreaming and if she was dreaming of me. Though it went against my better judgement, I reached out and touched her hair. This woman was and had been at one time the most important person in my life and though she was no longer firmly in my life, still she held my heart and squeezed it dry.

Blue cornflower eyes fluttered and opened, staring into my own. She said one word. But it was enough.

"Troy," she said, in a deep, throaty voice, and I found that my heart skipped a beat. The more things that changed, the more that stayed the same, especially between us. Would we never change? Would we always be forbidden to each other, and helplessly, hopelessly, deeply in love.

"Heaven," I said as, she struggled to sit up.


	7. Buisnesswoman

The Businesswoman

I thought I heard music drift toward me and I smiled, in my sleep, remembering how Troy had come to me to apologize for driving me away. He had been so tender and caring, so strong and sensitive, and so many other things that I had needed and never known I had needed. He was like so fantasy I had concocted in my youth, even before I had met Logan, and here he was in the flesh and blood of a man.

Moments later, I stiffened, feeling someone in my room. My eyes opened, and a string of words were on the tip of my tongue to spout to my father, words that instantly died as soon as the deep orbs of his eyes met mine. They were eyes I would know instantly and forever. Eyes that I had yearned for, eyes that had haunted me for many years. "Troy?" I whispered, hoping it was him, and hoping he would forgive me, it was his forgiveness rather than any of faith that I longed for.

"Heaven," he replied, and I closed my eyes, hoping he wouldn't disappear when I opened my eyes again, savoring the sound of my name from my beloved lips.

"You're alive?" We asked in unison.

"Am I dreaming?" I asked.

"If you are then I'm having the same one," he said, with a gentle chuckle as he sat on the end of my bed, taking my hands in his, gently tracing the pattern of them. Our time together had been all too brief. Tears sprung to my eyes, I was having a hard time believing I was really here with him, after all this time.

"I've missed you," I said, my extensive vocabulary failing me. So much lost time between us, so many mistakes, some I had made, some had been made by others. If only I hadn't rushed into marrying Logan, then we could have been together. "And I'm sorry," I said.

"Sorry for what, my love?" He asked me, he really was too good for me. No wonder he had had dreams of dying young. He was too good for this world, he was one of the only truly good, pure things in my life, and I wasn't giving him up again.

"For keeping Annie from you," I said, memories of Annie and her childhood flitting over me. She had been the very best part of both of us. I wasn't perfect, I wasn't the angel my mother had been, and perhaps the Reverend had been right about me, but I loved Annie and Troy and wondered if for many years I hadn't been subconsciously punishing Logan, not for his affair with Fanny, but for not being Troy.

"Heaven," Troy said exhaling slowly. "How could I hate you?" He said and I cringed, "How could I ever do anything but love you, if I had known that that was your fear..." He trailed off, more than likely wondering what he could have done differently. "Annie has turned out well. She's a very bright, intelligent, beautiful, sensitive girl, and you have done well with her. I didn't make it easy for you to find me, and you provided her with a wonderful childhood, what more could I have asked for?" He said, looking into my eyes.

"Oh, Troy, I wish things could have been different," I told him, tears splashing forward to wet my cheeks.

"I love you, Heavenly, you've always known that," he said and I nodded, as he came forward and held me while I sobbed at the unfairness of everything. "Tony told me you had died in the crash that paralyzed Annie and killed your husband," Troy said finally, once my tears had subsided and he handed me a handkerchief.

"So Logan is dead? Are you sure?" I asked him, although perhaps it was unfair to ask my one true love about my husband.

"As far as I know, but Heaven, I will do everything I can to find out for you. It seems as if it has been some years since his parents have passed away, I can't think of any reason Tony would have for keeping him alive and away from you and Annie," Troy said reasonably. I wasn't sure, could this be another way to control my life. I knew he had controlled Jillian's life. She had married him, so to some degree it was even expected. He had wanted to control my mother's life as well and mine and even Annie's. I had done everything I could to keep Annie away from him, and had lost. This accident of mine was a definite setback. But I was determined to make it temporary.

"Did you see Annie?" I asked him. I watched as his lips twitched, he was fighting a smile as he looked at me.

"Oh, yes, I've seen Annie," he said, a smile alighting on his sensual lips. "She's back in Winnerrow with Fanny and Luke Junior," he said, softly. "She's a lot like you, Heaven, you should be proud. I hope that whatever she has inherited from you is enough to overcome whatever melancholy she's inherited from me."I didn't know what to say. I had longed for him for so long, that it was hard to believe that he was here beside me.

"Does Tony know?" I couldn't help but ask in a flat voice.

"No, Heaven," he said, shaking his head softly. "That wasn't my secret to tell." I nodded, this was so like Troy. To think of my feelings, and Tony's above his own. He looked at me, his eyes meeting mine. "Heaven, oh my heavenly Heaven," he said pulling me to him. "I never stopped loving you."

"I still love you," I whispered, my lips a breath away from his. My heart beat faster and faster as my lips closed the difference between us. My breath came out faster and faster. "Oh, Troy," I whispered.

"Heaven," he said, holding me until my breath became even again.

"I should go, and you should return to Winnerrow and...Annie," he said after a pause.

"To our daughter," I corrected him. "Come with me, escape this house with me," I pleaded.

"I don't know that I can," he said, sadly. "Fathy is a part of me, no matter how far I go and how long it has been I always long to come back, I always return. I may not be the master of Farthy but a part of me will always be here, and at the cottage," he said softly. "Besides, where will I go? I've been everywhere, but something always draws me back. Where would we go? Back to Winnerrow?"

That had been my plan, yes. The Hasbrooke House as well as Willies Toy Factory still belonged to me. Nobody knew the truth about my parentage other than Fanny. "We can go anywhere. We can be a real family, finally," I couldn't help but say. "Like we always planned,"I found myself saying. "You, me, and Annie."

"What are you going to tell her, Heaven? She deserves the truth," he told me, and I knew he was right. I was trying to work up the courage to tell her right before Fanny's birthday party, I had set all the cards in motion, and was waiting for her to come to me. "Just think how devastated we all were to find out the truth. Heaven, the truth is worth more than all the Tatterton money."

"I know," I said, wrapping my arms around him. "I was trying to get up the courage to tell her before everything happened," I whispered, laying my head on his chest. "Stay," I said, when he moved to get up. "It's been so long since it's just been us, since I could wake up and see you, here, with me."

"I can't," he responded. "Tony will be here in the morning to wake you. Heaven, listen to me, I know that Tony's been slipping. Please leave before he does something he regrets, I don't want to see anything happen to you, don't stay for me."

"Then come with me," I repeated again. "I will tell Annie everything and make it right."

"We'll talk about it later," he said, wrapping his arms around me. "I will stay until you all asleep, my love," he said, as he cupped my face, and kissed my lips softly, "Don't ask anymore from me."

He was right, perhaps I was more like Tony than I ever cared to admit, demanding too much from my only true love. I thought about what I would say next to Annie, and imagined the different scenerios. She would understand how it was for us, she had to.


End file.
